Born to Stand Out!
Learning to depend on oneself and God above has been my saving grace! I have had many experiences with friends in my time, so friends coming and going has never been an issue.
A loner most of my life, because I am different and admit willingly that I was never born to follow, but I was born to lead and stand out I do!
I always have. From primary school where I was bullied to high school, where I was laughed at due to having a strict African mother with a tight curfew and tv schedule in the evenings after school.
Ridicule and jumping over hurdles has been a regular and normal part of my life, so lonliness is something I have learned to deal with and at times embrace with open arms. Over the past year plus two, since going into business really, I find I have battled the deepest within to keep my sanity, my happiness, my faith, my life and health and my deepest emotions together.
Loving and dealing with love has it's own ups and downs and becomes even harder coupled with the fact that you both live over 200 miles apart.
Finding the strength to let go of holding onto dreams that no longer served their purpose because they were so rigid in structure, there was no room to grow!
Well, I have learned to let go! It wasn't easy at first, but I decided that I had gotten to the bottom of my energy supply that I gave up all my will and surrendered to whatever plan and path the Lord intended me to undertake.
Now with all that said, being a stubborn and very extremely strong willed being, it hurt to let it all go. My hopes, dreams, desires, love, business, happiness and wants - when I learned to let go...I began to feel content.
So content and grateful that I have come so far!
I carry battlewounds that used to run so deep they showed, but now the surface is all that carries a faint tarnish in my packaging.
This new decision has been brewing for a while, in thought and mindset, but my body wasn't quite yet ready to let go because in a way, pain and discomfort become comfortable.
I know that sounds ridiculous to grasp, however when that is what you know, it becomes the norm!